Blog #656: First Dates

November 11, 2008.

That’s the date I sent my first blog.

______

My first one.

It was anxiety-rich to write.

It was terrifying to send.

“What will people think of me when they read it?”

I got lucky with myself.

I hit “send.”

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The first time is hard.

The first time we hit “send.”
The first day we show up to the gym or class.
The first moment we choose to speak up.
The first time we tell someone our idea.

The first day of a new job or school.
The first time we ask someone to dance.
The first day we start writing the book.
The first day we have to live with the decision.

Unfortunately, it’s true…

The thought of living a first can be so overwhelming…

We choose to never live the first.

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Life is easier when we limit our firsts.

Do any of us…

Like to be embarrassed?

Like to feel humiliated?

Like to be seen as failing?

So why even put the first in motion?

It’s easier to live holding back.

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BUT…

When we hold back from living firsts…

We steal from ourselves.

Adventures.

Opportunities.

Experiences.

Achievements.

Learning.

Joys.

Sure…

Life may be easier without firsts…

But it is definitely not better.

When we hold back from living firsts…

We live as our own shadow.

______

I will not die being my shadow.

Watching.

Wondering.

Following.

“What could I have lived?”

It’s a crummy thought to end life with.

And I don’t want to wear it.

I’d guess with confidence you don’t want to…either.

So…

Hit “send.”

A lot.

S.

PS: The photo above is from my 48-day, 750-mile, 88-temple walk around Shikoku, Japan. I took my first step on that walk on April 15, 2016. My head is starting to whisper to my feet…one more time.